Still waiting…..uniform ready!

The stars aligned in October and the world didn’t end, and unfortunately Jesus didn’t come back either!!  Nibiru is still reported to be flying close by to our planet yet still eludes us.  Antifa didn’t show up on Nov 4th for the much anticipated brawl.  The government didn’t appear to conduct the mass EMP drill we were told to expect and Trump continues to stall on pounding North Korea back to the dark ages  **Insert sigh**

Why do I get so focused on the end of the world or end of society as we know it crap??  I have 2 ‘bug out’ bags (I call them our ‘Oh Shit’ bags actually) at home ready to go 24/7 and constantly look out for new stories about situations spiraling out of control which will require me to suit up and protect my wife and family.  And by suit, I mean my old army uniform! haha….

I don’t want the world to end, I don’t want nuclear war either.  What am I waiting for? I have a good job that keeps me busy, wonderful social life but ache for just something to ‘happen’ that pushes me to put my skills to real use.  My doctor at the VA has put this down to my PTSD, is she right? Is it a case of me being so hyper vigilant and alert that I am simply looking for any reason so lace up my combats boots and start cracking skulls again??

I think I put it down to that simply desire to make a difference.  One that drove me to enlist and continues to drive me now, even if in other ways.  IF it is part of my PTSD, will it ever go away? Am I gonna be one of the old timers threatening to whoop someone’s arse at the movie theatre when I’m 75? haha I pray to Jesus I have mellowed out at that point in my life!

For now I will remain ready, its part of me.  Drill sergeant rants continue to ‘haunt’ me to this day, “stay alert, stay alive” haha.  My wife hears it enough!  So it Antifa comes calling or Nibiru decides to make an appearance.  Follow me!

You can find me in my full battle rattle locked and cocked, perhaps with a walking frame at that point.  But i’ll always be ready!

I am my brother’s keeper!

Advertisements

Author: 22PTSD

I'm from England and moved to the US in my mid 20's. I served in the US Army for 8 years and deployed over seas 3 times between 2006 and 2013. I'm now 39 and am married to a wonderful, beautiful woman from Massachusetts. She has been my rock during some very dark personal struggles with my combat PTSD and continues to support me daily! We recently relocated to Texas with our pup! I work for the federal government and am a die hard Manchester United fan!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s